Warning: This is a blog that lacks intellectuality. My levels of IQ stand as lofty as that of Paris Hilton's pet pomeranian and my knowledge of current affairs is as deep as Mandira Bedi's of cricket. I mostly ramble about the trivialities of my everyday life, F.R.I.E.N.D.S, friends n family, movies, cricket; basically thoughts that would enter the mind of any Sita, Gita or Rita.

Note: I was busy drooling over the pages of Playboy during my English classes in school. So please bare with any grammatical blunders or the obvious lack of classic literary writing. (I was a little confused between the selection of 'bear' and 'bare' in the sentence above so I resorted to my favorite inky-pinky-ponky routine)

If you happen to pass by, feel free to register your presence. coz yeh duniya bahot chhoti hai aur yeh zindagi bahot lambi. Kya pata, someday somewhere, you and I might end up discussing about it over a cup of garam garam masala tea.

Saturday, June 14, 2008

Kaali waali Black dal

Yesterday night, I want to take dinner at Min Mini Punjabi Dhaba. Now it is no fancy 5 star restaurant where Kareena n Saif might be spotted cuddling in a corner. Haan, Kareena ke ghar pe kaam karte Ramu kaka ke banaras ki mausi ka beta shayad dikh jaye.

To as we entered the dhaba, I could see printouts stuck all over the walls saying 'Deviced rates'. Now if it would have said 'Reviced rates' I might have understood that the library collection of the dhaba owner was lacking the 'Wren and Martin'. But yeh deviced rate kya hua. Did he mean that since the printouts were an output of the printer, which is a device, an electronic device, the rates are deviced rates?

As we occupied a table, a duplicate of Keshto Mukherjee came and handed us the menu. And before allowing us to have a look at the menu he started saying 'Aloo gobi, rajma, baingan bharta, yellow dal, black dal'. He kept on saying it again and again until we had to frantically gesture to him to stop his nonstop rajdhani. Now I am no Sanjeev Kapoor so I wanted to know the ingredients of this black dal.

Me: Boss, yeh black dal mein dal kaunsi aayegi
He: kaali waali.

It was one of those you-had-to-be-there moments. People on all tables were in splits. The kind of loud, uncontrolled, non-stop laughter.

After placing the order, we scanned the menu which had a lot more items than the 5 which the Keshto Mukherjee duplicate was parotting. We had even more laughs. Menu mein English ka bhai-baap ek kar diya tha.

Shayad aisi chotti chotti baaton mein hi zindagi ka asli mazza hai. These are moments that one will not get in a 5 istar restaurant. 5 istar mein to one finds highly fancy names in the menu card jo shayad Queen Elizabeth ke bhi palle na pade. aur saala bill dekhke to vaat lagti hai. wallet hava ke maafik halka ho jaata hai.

apun ko halka hoke udna nahi hai. coz I am a very down to earth person. to Mr Keshto Mukherjee duplicate, yeh main aaya.. aaj black dal mein kaunsi dal daalne waale hai tu?


PizzaDude said...


Btw, I really liked the photo in your blog header. Where was it taken? Goa ?

Jaydip Mehta said...

Hey Urv,
Quite funny writing. You have good skill.

Can not stop laughing.. Title itseld for this post is funny .. I like "Menu mein English ka bhai-baap ek kar diya tha" very much ...

:-) ...

Urv said...

Photu goa ka nai hai. Its the Kashid beach, near Mumbai-Alibaug. Mast beach tha.

~jaydip mehta
thanku sir. Hanste rahiyo. Hansne ke paihe nai lagte :)

Stupidosaur said...

Unlike the rates of 5 star hotel, the rates of the dhaba don't have any vice. They are perfectly good natured and friendly. Hence they are called deviced rates.

Aur agar dal mein kuchh kala na ho, to khaney ke baad remember to give happily Cash To Mukherjee

Akshay said...

It's interesting to see what these people do to English....but i guess it doesn't really matter ....Mazaa to aaya kam se kam.... my friend has an employee who adds "s" to pretty much every word.....

Urv said...

Aha! one more theory we have now :)

Yeahs thatss trues. Mazzas tos bahuts aayas :)

shub said...

hahahaha! and the "Haan, Kareena ke ghar pe kaam karte Ramu kaka ke banaras ki mausi ka beta shayad dikh jaye" especially cracked me up :D

Urv said...

he he :D :D achha hai apun ka intention rang laya :)

Bhai with Chai said...

LOL! Mast! :)
btw.. Had gone to Banglore once, there, they give you peeli waali yellow daal with naan! :/

Urv said...

~bhai with chai
:D next time you come I will get you the kaali waali black dal ;)

Anonymous said...

it was damn funny :D
you narrate well :)